COACHING COUPLES WITH RELATIONAL LIFE THERAPY

Helping Couples Move From Power Struggles to Connection

Strong & Connected offers couples coaching grounded in Relational Life Therapy (RLT)—the approach developed by Terry Real that helps couples break destructive patterns and build mutual respect, accountability, and connection.

This work is for couples who:

• Love each other but feel stuck in recurring conflict
• Are caught in cycles of blame, defensiveness, or withdrawal
• Feel disconnected, resentful, or emotionally distant
• Want real tools—not just insight—to change how they relate
• Are willing to be honest about impact, not just intention

Couples coaching is offered online, with a focus on serving couples in Vancouver and also serving partners across British Columbia, Ontario and Canada.

👉 Book a Strong & Connected consultation
Proven method. Results oriented. Safe and empathetic.

What Makes Relational Life Therapy Different for Couples

Relational Life Therapy starts from a clear premise: The problem isn’t who’s right.
The problem is the pattern you’re stuck in together.

Most distressed couples are caught in power struggles fueled by:

• Defensiveness and counterattack
• Emotional withdrawal or shutdown
• Criticism, contempt, or stonewalling
• Unspoken resentment and unmet needs

RLT helps couples:

• Identify the cycle that keeps them stuck
• Take responsibility for their part—without collapsing or blaming
• Shift out of reactive “child” positions into grounded, adult      relating
• Speak honestly while staying connected
• Repair ruptures instead of escalating conflict

This approach balances fierce truth with fierce compassion. 

Relational Life Therapy–Informed Couples Coaching

Couples coaching focuses on:

• Breaking negative conflict cycles
• Learning to regulate emotion during difficult conversations
• Communicating needs clearly and respectfully
• Rebuilding trust through consistent, accountable behavior
• Creating a relationship based on mutuality rather than power

Sessions are active, structured, and focused on what actually happens between you—not abstract theory.

 Couples often seek coaching following:

• Chronic conflict or emotional disconnection
• Trust injuries or betrayals
• Years of unresolved resentment
• Major life stressors or transitions

This work helps couples slow things down, name what’s really happening, and practice repair—not avoidance or escalation.

 Some couples appear fine on the surface but feel distant underneath.

Coaching can help partners:

• Move out of parallel lives into real connection
• Address unspoken dissatisfaction before it hardens into contempt
• Build emotional intimacy without losing individuality
• Create a shared sense of teamwork and respect

Relational Life Therapy–informed couples coaching works best when both partners are willing to:

• Look honestly at their own impact
• Take responsibility without defensiveness
• Stay engaged even when it’s uncomfortable
• Practice new ways of speaking and listening
• Commit to change through action—not just insight

This is not about blaming one partner or fixing the other. It’s about changing the dance you’re stuck in together.

Couples who commit to this work often report:

• Less escalation and more productive conversations
• Greater emotional safety and trust
• Clearer boundaries and expectations
• Increased intimacy and connection
• A renewed sense of “we’re on the same team”

This work doesn’t guarantee staying together;  it does support relating with integrity, whether couples remain together or not. 

• Format: Joint online sessions
• Approach: Therapy-informed coaching grounded in Relational Life Therapy (RLT)
• Focus: Accountability, emotional regulation,  communication, repair
• Location: Serving couples across British Columbia, Ontario and elsewhere in Canada

Relational Life Therapy–informed couples coaching is not a fit for every couple.
It works best for partners who are willing to be honest, take responsibility, and practice new ways of relating—even when it’s uncomfortable.

RLT May Be a Good Fit If You:

• Feel stuck in the same arguments and power struggles
• Want to understand patterns, not just rehash past fights
• Are willing to look at your own impact—not just your partner’s behavior
• Want direct, respectful guidance rather than neutral “both sides” therapy
• Are open to being challenged with compassion
• Want real tools for communication, repair, and emotional regulation

This approach helps couples move out of blame and defensiveness and into adult-to-adult relating.

RLT May Not Be the Right Fit If You:

• Want the therapist to take sides or determine who’s “right”
• Are unwilling to examine your own role in conflict
• Expect change without practicing new behaviors
• Prefer purely supportive or insight-only therapy
• Are seeking a quick fix without personal accountability

Relational Life Therapy is active and participatory. Change happens through practice, not passive understanding.

What RLT Asks of Both Partners

RLT-informed couples coaching invites both partners to:

• Regulate emotion during difficult conversations
• Speak honestly without attacking or withdrawing
• Take responsibility for impact, not just intention
• Repair ruptures rather than escalate or avoid
• Build a relationship based on mutuality, respect, and integrity

This is fierce compassion—truth delivered with care, and care delivered with clarity.

A Note on Readiness

You don’t have to be perfect or agree on everything to begin.

What matters is a shared willingness to:

• Stay engaged
• Be honest
• Try something different

If one partner is unsure, that can be discussed during a free consultation.

The best way to know whether RLT is right for your relationship is to talk it through.

👉 Book a Strong & Connected couples consultation
Clear guidance. No blame. Real direction.